The Good Grief Project
I’m delighted that we’ll be joined by author Jane Harris and Dr. Kathryn Mannix on Wednesday 15th March, 6pm, where they’ll discuss the ground-breaking book When Words are not Enough: Creative Responses to Grief.
This first publication from ‘The Good Grief Project’ explores the many ways bereaved families express their loss. Ten years on from their son’s death in a traffic accident, the authors, Jane Harris and Jimmy Edmonds reflect on their journey and how they’ve used creativity to both survive their grief and maintain an on-going relationship with their late son, Joshua.
In the years that followed his death, Jane and Jimmy founded The Good Grief Project, a UK-based charity which uses their understanding of grief as a creative and active process to support other bereaved families.
This book follows their journey and tells the story of 13 other bereaved people. Parents, partners, siblings, children and friends — all who’ve found a creative response to their grief. Each of their stories are intimate, courageous and challenging, but they bring with them hope. They offer essential insights into the power of creativity and encourage the individual reader to find what works for them – whether that be arts, crafts or spending time in nature as a medium to reconnect with those we mourn.
Language of Grief
One of the many themes in the book that struck me personally is the statement that “grief is not a process, rather a state of being, and oscillation of states.” I can’t stress how important this statement is. This book guides us away from the traditional, Western view of grief as a journey with an end that we somehow get over and erase. Instead, we learn the possibility of a new state of being, made possible through thinking creatively and learning a new language to reframe ourselves, and those lost to us.
“Unlike most of life’s lessons, grief and mourning are not part of any school curriculum, so it’s hardly surprising that death, dying and bereavement are such uncomfortable conversations for many of us to engage with”. When Words are not Enough: Creative Responses to Grief (page 37)
The language of grief, for the most part, is problematic in modern society, It can be deeply uncomfortable for us all – not least because facing the bereaved reminds us of our own mortality. As a society, we need to unlearn this and talk more openly on the subject, rather than shutting barriers down at a time when we’re needed most. This would likely be a seismic shift in contemporary thinking, but this wonderful book certainly encourages us on that path.
Grief affects us all. My own experience of grief after the sudden loss of my partner, Gordon, follows similar lines. I was lucky, in a sense. I was already a practicing artist and instinctively knew it would be my way through, at the very least on the darkest days. I made sculpture — and lots of it. Most ended up in the bin, but it was the process of making, not necessarily the end result that was important.
I mourned the loss and what might have been; feeling a part of me was missing for so very long. Now, essentially, that idea has been flipped. I see Gordon as a tangible part of me. He had been an architect and an avid lover of literature, so I now see both mediums through the gaze of what he taught me. For this, I am grateful. I’m forever changed by grief, but I can now celebrate having had Gordon in my life and enjoy the continuing bond that will never be broken.
Through this book, the authors show us that that grief, by its very nature, is a creative process. It shows us ways we can survive the very worst of things and how we can foster an on-going relationship with those who’ve died. It teaches us that to create, doodle, run, swim… to do anything and EVERYTHING creative can and should be part of the process. But, most importantly, (and not just for the bereaved) it tells us to keep talking and saying their name.
This strikingly accessible book isn’t just for those currently bereaved, their families and friends; it’s a book for us all. Loss, and all that comes with it are a given. Something we all have to navigate and support others with.
I sincerely hope you’re able to join us for the live event. But if not, the event will be recorded and will be available on-demand. I would, however, urge everyone to read the book. It’s available from the Freud Museum Shop.
Lili Spain, Programmes Director, Freud Museum London
When Words are Not Enough: Creative Responses to Grief
15 March, 6:00 pm – 7:30 pm
The Freud Museum is pleased to welcome authors Jane Harris to discuss The Good Grief publication When Words are Not Enough: Creative Responses to Grief, with Dr Kathryn Mannix.
Buy the Book
Everyone grieves for someone at some point in their lives. But how do we deal with the silence that often surrounds grief? How do we find ways to express painful feelings when words are not enough?
In case studies they illustrate how creativity can shape a future where the deceased still play a part even while physically absent and how this is a normal and restorative aspect of the grieving process.
